Extras
Welcome! You've found the bonus room.
Here you'll find magical notices, character files, behind-the-scenes snippets and the occasional confidential document that somehow escaped from Genius Consultants...
📌 Genius Consultants Notice Board
👥 From the Staff Room
⭐ Client Feedback
❓ Reader Questions
📌 Genius Consultants Notice Board
Readers are advised that Genius Consultants accepts no responsibility for accidental transformations, misplaced wishes, self-filling coffee cups, or unusually communicative cats occurring while reading this notice board.
📝 Memo - June 2026
Staff are reminded that clients requesting: "A house with lots of light", generally mean windows. Last week's lighthouse was technically correct but we didn't get paid, so don't do it again.
📋 Health & Safety Notice - May 2026
Please note that dragons and llamas are not emotional support animals, and therefore not allowed in the office, unless it's 'Bring Your Pet to Work Day' which we haven't introduced yet, due to the whole dragon and llama issue (see earlier).
📋 Project Advice - April 2026
If a client asks for a golf course, "challenging" only refers to the layout and should not be interpreted as "requires mountaineering equipment."
⚠️ Important reminder - March 2026
The photocopier is for paperwork only.
Please stop experimenting.
👥 From the Staff Room
🏆 Employee of the Month - June 2026
This month's award goes to... Poppy (again).
For outstanding craftsmanship, impeccable client care, and for successfully resisting the urge to interpret "surprise me" literally.
Well done!
🎂 Happy Birthday - TODAY!
Best wishes to our boss, Osian Jones on his 60th or his 260th birthday, depending on who you believe.
A small birthday celebration will be held in the canteen this afternoon at 3pm. All welcome.
Staff are reminded that only standard birthday candles are to be used. Just for clarity, Aidan, this message is specifically aimed at you, after the unfortunate incident last time.
👋 New Starter - October 2025
We are delighted to welcome Amethyst to Genius Consultants as our new bookkeeper.
Staff are reminded that new colleagues should be made to feel welcome.
This specifically includes:
- not moving the doors;
- not enchanting her stationery;
- not encouraging the filing cabinets to bite.
Following the regrettable departure of our previous bookkeeper, we would appreciate everyone's cooperation.
⭐ Client Feedback
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
"Very pleased with the orangery. We particularly appreciated the consultant explaining why asking for 'a conservatory with character' required further discussion."
⭐⭐☆☆☆
"Asked for a Viking helmet. I didn't expect to get the Viking owner too. Customer support unhelpful."
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
"The library is magnificent. My husband has hardly been seen since it was completed, which is an unexpected bonus."
⭐⭐⭐☆☆
"Professional service throughout. The consultant asked many sensible questions, most of which I thought unnecessary at the time. I now concede they probably weren't."
❓ Reader Questions
💬 What's the most common mistake Genius clients make?
Using words such as:
- little
- grand
- traditional
- perfect
These mean different things to different people.
Our consultants exist to make sure everyone leaves the meeting with the same understanding.